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Strong Astroboy


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Strong Astroboy Oh, sorry, man, the wine’s gotten me a little loaded. It’s okay, Abbott. Don’t worry about it. BERNIE Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together. CROWD CLAPPING You asked for it, you paid for ’em. And here they are, the fabulous Radio Werewolf! ORGAN PLAYING SPOOKY MELODY CHEERING WILD ROCK SONG PLAYING Driving down A desolate highway Headlights burning red Like a demon’s eyes There’s a shadow In your rearview mirror I’ve never heard such an ugly noise. Dad, this is the happiest day of my life. Money can buy happiness, can’t it? And don’t you forget it. Hey, where’s my wallet. My wallet! Burning rubber on Route Turn on the ignition With my skeleton key Hear my Throttle it, man And she screeches out At the cemetery Valerie, whatever happens, meet me on the roof in a few minutes, okay? I’ll be there. She’s not An inanimate object Why can’t these fools see? Fifty thousand miles Of funerals Have chartered this hearse For eternity Fags. ‘Cause I’m in love with… I love you. I love you too. Shall we try a kiss? Anything might happen. What’s life without risk? MECHANICAL WHIRRING So if you’re driving Down a desolate highway Headlights burning red Like a demon’s eyes You’ll see a shadow In your rearview mirror Well, have no fear It’s just my baby and I From her supersized trunk To her chromelined fins Her glass packs roar ’cause She’s blowing in the wind She’s a hitchhiker’s Nightmare A mortician’s dream I love my baby But she knows who comes first ‘Cause I’m in love With my Cadillac hearse DISTORTED … ALL CHEERING EXPLOSION HORN BELLOWS HORN BELLOWS FLY BUZZING Mr. Truscott. Captain. I, um… I can’t help but notice that your wife hasn’t moved for several hours. That’s one of the things I love about her. She’s so quiet and selfcontained. But she hasn’t talked to anyone since the cruise began. Intelligent women, like my wife, usually don’t speak unless they have something to say. Well, enjoy the cru


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